Just over a week until I go on a mission trip and I’m terrified, more afraid than when I was 19 and I left for three months, traveling to three different countries, living on board a ship.
I’m only going for two weeks and yet this is one of the scariest things I have done.
Why, because I’m going to see things, I don’t want to see, things that I want to pretend don’t happen.
I’m going to see lives I can not reach, hearts I can not heal, evils I can not defeat.
I like my comfort zone, the big safe walls of apathy. A safe clean place where slavery is something I just read about.
I don’t want to see the broken abused and crushed. The faces of children who have been touched by more evil than I could even begin to imagine.
But I have to go.
I have to know.
I have to see, I must open my heart to be broken by what breaks God’s heart. Only then can I truly be used, only then can I become part of the hope.
I need to see the power of God’s healing and love, see how the lives of those rescued are restored and changed by a God who hears and makes new.
So I go..
Here I am God, break my heart for what breaks yours.